A: IW - May 1

Where to begin?

Firstly, because real life is sometimes sucky, sometimes crazy, and sometimes – stupid, I made a mistake regarding Thanos, Loki and co. the last time we talked. Thanos did kill Loki in public, perhaps to make a point within the MCU, perhaps to make a point without, but kill Loki he did, blatantly and in public too. Poor Loki, but – the point still stands. MCU, in general, has experienced the biggest loss of characters ever, and while they can be brought back, actors – from the real life’s side of things – are something else. ‘Thor’ franchise is especially notorious of that, as Sif, Jane Foster, Dr. Selvig, to a lesser extent Odin, the Warriors 3, and now – Heimdall too – have all vanished from the MCU, leaving ‘Thor’ with, well, just Thor, and maybe not even that. It is certainly a potent way of changing the landscape of a cinematic universe, but will the actors be willing to come back, ever? Given the case of Hawkeye, maybe not.

No, seriously, Hawkeye appears very rarely in MCU, if ever. He appeared in the first ‘Avengers’ movie, in ‘Avengers: Age of Ultron’ movie, and in ‘CA: CW’ film…and this is it, I believe. If he’d actually died back in ‘Ultron’ it would make more sense and less disrespectful/dismissive to the MCU fans, but here is what we have; in A: IW1, we get no Hawkeye, again. Ditto for the Ant-Man, of course, but he and the Wasp are coming forth with their own film now, fighting the Ghost, and this is important, because the Quantum Zone is mentioned in that trailer, and this may be where all the missing people have ended up at…or not. Maybe Thanos succeeded completely and everyone died instead. Either way, we will get more clarification about this in the future Marvel movies…hopefully.

Speaking of trailers… the ‘Venom’ trailer has appeared in April 2018 too, and it is going to be an origin movie on one hand, and does not have any Venom-Spidey interactions on the other, which is strange, since Venom is one of Spider-Man’s worst rivals. Yet, if Spider-Man is stuck in the Quantum Zone, then he cannot interact with Venom, (let us presume so, anyhow), so no Spider-Man in this Venom movie, anyhow. Bully for him!

Anything else? Again, it is unknown just how AoS and its S5 plot fits into the greater MCU, in the current case – into the Infinity War plotline. Right now, General Talbot has become a Graviton-like figure and is going to save the world by killing the alien ninjas, because this is who the current aliens are – ninjas of some sort, and not even Kree, because none of them are blue…and some people still wonder as to why AoS’ numbers are so low. AoS just does not fit into MCU anymore, not since the second half of its second season, most likely, and where does it leave them?

Well, so far it seems that the S5 finale is the season’s finale, not the series’, so there’s probably some sort of a S6 somewhere in the works…eventually. Considering that Coulson (and his actor) are appearing in the upcoming ‘Captain Marvel’ movie too, that theoretical season will be Coulson-light, because of split priorities, you know?

…Anything else? No, not at this time. For the moment, real life has stabilized itself, so let us enjoy it. Until the next time – see you then.

S.H.I.E.L.D. 'Option Two' - April 28

This week’s episode of AoS was aired yesterday. In more exciting news, the ‘Avengers: Infinity War’ part 1 movie was aired yesterday too. What shall we talk about first?

One thing that connects the two – aside from the Marvel logo – is, or rather are, Hill and Fury. These former leaders of S.H.I.E.L.D. appeared in A: IW1 post-credit scenes. What we need to focus on here, passing the potential spoiler situation, is the fact that they are still out and about in MCU at large, so…why haven’t they visited their friend Phil Coulson and the remainder of S.H.I.E.L.D. at the Lighthouse? Fury appeared only in AoS S1, Hill – in S1 and 2, but still, if their actors still star in MCU features, why not on AoS? AoS seems to be bleeding actors still, but-

But the same may be said about MCU too? A: IW1 had Thanos kill Loki, Heimdall and Valkyrie, apparently, since they do not appear in the movie. Why? And how? And how come?

…Yes, Loki has practice at pretending to die, and so he may have had Thanos fooled, and rescued Valkyrie and/or Heimdall and some other Asgardian refugees, but again, couldn’t this be featured in the movie? And as we know, Loki did work for Thanos, so why would Thanos kill him now? Because of the initial failure? Maybe, but again, it could have happened on-screen, especially if this just the first half of a duology.

Dead aliens bring us back to AoS. General-brigadier Talbot, of all people, fused with gravitonium in this episode and killed the alien invaders. Pause. The aliens of ‘Option Two’ – this week’s episode – weren’t even Kree; just some crazy alien ninjas that could generate their own clouds of darkness, were resilient to ordinary bullets and armed with kunai, rather than katanas; the latter were used by Mack and May instead. Since when does S.H.I.E.L.D. use katanas? Since they have tried to rip-off ‘The Defenders’, it seems.

‘The Defenders’ deserve a mention of their own, since S2 of ‘Luke Cage’ is coming to Netflix and beyond in summer 2018. S2 of ‘Jessica Jones’ was marked by some interesting twists and turns, including a semi-weak villain storyline, and her resemblance of BtVS’ Faith the Vampire Slayer – but that’s ‘Jessica Jones’. ‘Luke Cage’ is a different story…and another issue that the fans and viewers had with ‘Jessica Jones’ was the lack of reference to ‘The Defenders’ (S1) plotline. Will ‘Luke Cage’ be different? But we must get more information on his S2 first…

Instead, we learn that ‘Cloak & Dagger’ are also coming to TV (Freeform), this summer. By now, we know that the show will take a more spiritual/religious take on the duo than the comics usually do, so S1 of this show will be interesting to watch as well…

None of this is helping AoS though; last week’s episode’s numbers were lower even they were for the ‘Life Earned’ episode. That is just sad, but that is bad luck for you: some time in the last third of S4, AoS reached a point where viewers just were not excited about it anymore, and it shows. Sucks to be it.

…That is it for this week; see you soon!

Shadow polar bear - April 25

For a change, here's a polar bear, augmented with the shadow template from the latest Pathfinder: Campaign Setting book. (Nidal). How it looks?

SHADOW POLAR BEAR CR 6

XP 1,600

N Large outsider (native)

Init +3; Senses darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision, scent; Perception +8

DEFENSE

AC 20, touch 12, flat-footed 17 (+3 Dex, +7 natural, -1 size)

hp 52 (5d8+30)

Fort +10, Ref +7, Will +4

Defensive Abilities shadow blend

OFFENSE

Speed 50 ft., swim 30 ft.

Melee bite +9 (1d8+7), 2 claws +9 (1d6+7 plus grab)

Space 10 ft.; Reach 5 ft.

Special Abilities hide in plain sight, resistance cold 10

STATISTICS

Str 25, Dex 21, Con 23, Int 4, Wis 18, Cha 14

Base Atk +3; CMB +11 (+15 grapple); CMD 24 (28 vs. trip)

Feats Endurance, Run, Skill Focus (Survival)

Skills Perception +8, Survival +8, Swim +19; Racial Modifiers +4 Intimidate, +4 Stealth

ECOLOGY

Environment cold coastlines or plains

Organization solitary or pair

Treasure none

real life is crazy - April 23

The obligatory disclaimer: real life…it does not suck, not always. Sometimes it is just insane instead. If you look on Yahoo’s™ news of the day, you will see why. I, incidentally, got caught on the tail end of the event in question, and just barely made it home. Go me. Not. Several other people got much more unlucky…

Anything else? Just that last week’s episode of MLP: FiM featured more of the hippogriff-merpony weirdness. Again. Yes, it is continuity with the MLP vs. the Storm King movie, but… again, who was the genius behind this idea? The whole sea to sky/land conversion isn’t too different from what Disney™ did in their ‘Little Mermaid’ franchise, but how would this work in a more anthropomorphic setting, (say, the Equestria Girls side-universe)? Merponies are, naturally, merfolk; Equestrian ponies correspond to the humans, dwarves and elves of the modern RPG worlds, so where do the new races fit in? And the hippogriffs, as I said in an earlier time, were an especially inconvenient idea, because – hybrid species, remember? So the entire merpony/hippogriff episode was weird; its’ main idea was sound and important, because it dealt with the fate and status of children of separated/divorced parents (grown-ups), due to irreconcilable, (or nearly so), differences…

So, where does this lead us? Nowhere, for today was just too full of insanity, the bad kind. Therefore, nothing more will be said today, not at the moment.

See you all soon instead!

S.H.I.E.L.D. 'Roads' - April 21

‘All roads lead…’ Lead to where?

Firstly, bad news – last week’s episode of AoS had the lowest numbers ever. For reasons discussed that week, it is not surprising. This week’s the tendencies continue: AoS continues to hemorrhage actors, even though they give their best performances ever, just look at Dove Cameron and her character, Ruby.

No, really, let us look at Ruby and her interactions with the rest of AoS characters. In a twist of… something, AoS killed Ruby on this week’s episode, leaving her mother, general ‘No First Name’ Hale to deal with S.H.I.E.L.D. and the alien Confederacy. With her hair literally down general NFN Hale does look more formidable and more Hydra, so there is that – good for her, hooray!

Back to AoS proper? Dove Cameron is a great actress and she delivered beautifully, but the thing is? Her character was supposed to be Daisy’s archnemesis, and that did not happen; in fact, the plot backflipped and presented Ruby as a very scared young woman who was in desperate need of love…and then Yo-Yo killed her with Ruby’s own chakram.

The chakram deserves a mention of its own – like, who was the genius who came up with it? And what was the motivation behind it? Was it some sort of a homage to Lucy Lawless, who played the character of agent Izzy Hartley for a couple of episodes at the beginning of S2? Frankly, that was not LL’s best character role, and anyhow, since we are in the final third of S5, this is a bit of stretch, plus Dove Cameron and Lucy Lawless do not have anything in common, so the chakram is a bit of a flop, just as Simmons’ declaration about her and Fitz’s advancement in the last week’s episode was. And speaking of Dove Cameron…

She is a great actress and expects to be paid accordingly. And unlike, say, ‘Blindspot’, AoS relies heavily on special effects, and CGI, and the like, which aren’t cheap either, so they probably cannot afford any heavy hitters from real life actors to keep on their payroll for very long, not considering that their main cast is big already. So’s ‘Blindspot’s’, but…

But ‘Blindspot’ is going for something different, and it is not the show in threat to be cancelled; AoS is. Of course, since the S5’s finale is named curtly ‘End’, it may be that this is the last season of AoS, cancellation or no cancellation. Gregg is remaining in MCU, since he is appearing in the upcoming ‘Captain Marvel’ movie at least; Wen is voicing a character in a GotG animated movie/cartoon, so MCU is not done with them, no, but with AoS? That’s another story.

And even now the show continues to mangle its’ characters; Deke has devolved into some scruffy schmuck; general Glenn Talbot became Hydra’s most incompetent brainwashed agent; Hinton the seer girl remains the most unsympathetic child actress ever.

No, seriously, is her character supposed to have the emotional range of a washroom tile wall or what? Her lack of emotions could do the Cavalry proud…but it is done in a bad way, to a point where the young Robin is unsympathetic, (whereas her senior citizen version is insipid and simpering), and that is bad. AoS is playing for speed now, events in its’ episodes are rushing like a spooked horse herd, and the actors and their characters are leaving just as fast: Anton is gone, and so’re Werner and Ruby. Creel is not gone, but his character was driven insane by gravitonium, so odds are he will not be appearing any time soon in AoS’ episodes either. What is left?

A good show that has been dealt a bad happen. In the second half of AoS’ S2, most of the actors left suddenly but at the same time, causing a shock. From S3, however, the actors still leave suddenly, in large amounts, (only the main cast remains, and even that underwent some changes as the show’s seasons went by, and now it has gotten worse. It is unknown of AoS will continue beyond this current season, but if it does – lucky for it!

That is it for this time, see you all soon!

Fallen Kingdom - April 18

The latest, and apparently the last, JW: FK trailer was released today. And?

And it is set in a world where dinosaurs – well, non-avian dinosaurs – will live alongside humans freely from now on, it seems. This puts JW (the movie franchise) right next to FH and the rest of Ubisoft™ games – firmly in the realm of fiction.

Here is the thing…actually, several things. FH itself is continuing to improve; the new training mode of the game truly makes things better and easier in the game, so there is no reason to complain about it, not in the immediate range. Many of FH’s initial flaws were technical, so Ubisoft™ fixed them with minimal fuss, and by now FH acquired or re-acquired enough of a stable fanbase to keep itself, well, stable. And flourishing. Good for them indeed, and if they have not released any of new heroes, then that is not a problem either: with the ‘regular cast’ increased from 12 characters to 18, there is someone for everyone already.

…If we are talking about Ubisoft™, then yes, there was the ‘Far Cry 5’ game released by it earlier in 2018 too. It is a good game, but very different from FH not just on the obvious level, but from the initial layout onwards. People have enjoyed playing it as well, but enough of them also agree that it is not the best ‘Far Cry’ game either. I am not really a big specialist of those Ubisoft™ games, so I am not going to go down there, sorry. …But ‘Far Cry 5’ still deserves a mention, because it is an Ubisoft™ game as well, if nothing else.

Back to the JW franchise? Look. From the start, even Michael Crichton made it an AU – if you read his first novel, for example, you will learn that that is a world where genetic modification was a part of common-day life; Hammond (the book character, and a different from how he was depicted in the movie), had a dwarf elephant, the size of a cat or a rat; his archrival, (the one who bribed Nedry in the first place), tested some sort of an anti-rabies vaccine on cattle in South America, and illegally too, but it didn’t feature in the movies, so that’s not the point – the point is that in the novels, the Jurassic Park and its’ associated existed in a universe that was alternate to ours from the start; and now…

Now we are going into the full realm of science fiction, just with dinosaurs rather than space travel or whatever. The Indoraptor looks like a cross between a raptor from the JP3 movie and a D&D troll, while acting like an all-too-human stalker of young children…but so did the dinosaurs, or rather – especially the carnivores – in the original novels; they just couldn’t help but to kill humans just because, and the previous JW movie was actually more restrained than the JP3 film was in that area. Anything else?

The mosasaur seems to act rather like a monster shark from the recent monster movies would, but so what? ‘The Meg’ is also coming later in 2018 and it shows that the shark – or rather, an idea of the shark – has appropriated its’ own place among fictional monsters, so there is that. So far, no one has tried to create a ‘Jurassic shark’, but I am sure that between the ‘Deep Blue Sea’ movie series and the upcoming ‘Meg’ movie someone will.

…In related news, ‘Westworld’ the TV series is returning to TV in 2018 too; it is a Jurassic Park but with androids (mostly cowboy androids, but there are others, or there will be), instead of dinosaurs. The S1 of the series was already very exciting, so there is every reason to believe that the S2 will be just as good. Hurray!

…And that is it for now, see you all soon.

S.H.I.E.L.D. 'Honeymoon' - April 14

‘The Honeymoon’ was aired last night. And…AoS continues to disappoint. Why? Because it is disjointed.

Let us try again. Firstly, AoS continues to disrespect its’ characters by constantly redesigning them. In this episode, general Hale – who still lacks a first name, but by now is taking her hair down, on occasion, making her look more like her daughter, Ruby – talks about ‘the chamber’ with her latest right-hand woman, how she wants Ivanov to go into it first, to learn what it will do to human flesh, etc. This does make her sound ruthless, as a Hydra head should be, but…

But Ivanov is a robot by now; in S4, AIDA has destroyed his old body completely and remade him into several LMDs. Whatever LMD of Ivanov survived, they would be completely inorganic as well, (save for the brain, maybe), and as such the chamber’s effect on Ivanov would be completely different from what it would be on Ruby, because the latter doesn’t appear to be an LMD or an android; so far she appears to be wholly organic. This will change in the next episode, but still a point must be made, beforehand.

The same goes for Yo-Yo. Poor NCB, (aka the actress). Clearly, AoS cannot afford to give her character special effects in regards to superspeed, so they made her a cyborg instead; Yo-Yo still has speed, she just cannot use it, because it hurts her very badly instead. This is a crummy thing to do a character; Yo-Yo was built around her speed and now she will be rebuilt from scratch just because – but we talked about how AoS disrespects its’ characters…without any good reason.

And now we have the disjunction on top of disrespect. Not so long ago, the Marvel comics ran a promo picture-collage for AoS: S1 promo on top, S5 on the bottom. The two pictures just did not match – not just because Ward is back, while Mack and Yo-Yo have toughed it out, but because the style, the layout, the depiction, the atmosphere, everything is different; from S1 to S5 AoS became a different show completely!

Now, this does not make AoS unique; ‘Primeval’ of ‘Impossible Pictures’ (IP) has done the same thing, with fewer episodes than AoS has…and it is gone now. IP tried to reboot the series with ‘Primeval: New World’ (P: NW), but it has died after just a single season, and yes, the Primeval series and the rest of IP had a bad break regarding their mother company the BBC and the entirety of ‘Walking with…’ franchise, but the fluidity of its’ acting cast – we’re still talking about the original ‘Primeval’ series here – didn’t help the situation either. At least AoS is constant in that each of its’ seasons was about 22 episodes long – ‘Primeval’ didn’t even had that; its’ various seasons had different amount of episodes, and thus ‘Primeval’ suffered…

Back to AoS? The title of this episode reflects the honeymoon of the FitzSimmons, but the episode itself didn’t do such a good job with it; the FitzSimmons’ plot line was only one of several featured in this episode, (and the entire episode feels rushed); at one moment, Simmons comments to Fitz about how they know now how to strap on a parachute correctly, but…

But the reference is of that S1 episode, when Simmons got infested with an alien virus, and while she did get cured, she did jumped out of the plane to prevent infesting the others…and Grant Ward, now forgotten, jumped out and caught her. Fitz did not. Ergo, this statement of Simmons is devalued and is meaningless, or even a lie. The way that the FitzSimmons fought Hydra’s robot soldiers in synchronisation again reflects how…Grant and May, (or maybe Coulson and May, I am not sure), fought a bunch of rebel soldiers in another S1 episode, so how does that relates to the FitzSimmons directly?

…And then, of course, there are the Star Wars elements; in particular, Jemma Simons is lately dressed – and wears her hair – in a style vaguely reminiscent of Ray from the new trilogy and of Jyn from the ‘Rogue One’ movie. What is up with that?

…SW references aside…this episode of AoS was a mess, and not even the FitzSimmons could save it. They, together with Yo-Yo, have tricked Mack, causing him to stay on the base, just in time save Deke, who had been shot helping Daisy, by being a doctor, right alongside agent Piper.

…Neither Mack nor Piper showed any signs of being medically savvy ever in AoS before; yes, Mack did help Simmons graft the cyborg arms onto Yo-Yo recently, but the key words here are ‘helping Simmons’. Ever since Piper appears in AoS in S4, she was shown to be only May’s protégé, nothing more, and May herself is not that medically savvy either.

So. AoS numbers continue to fall; they have come up, or rather – come upwards – in the last week’s episode, but if AoS continues to, well, disrespect itself, it’s doubtful that this streak will last for very long.

…That is it for this time; see you all soon!