Friday, 7 May 2021

Peloton and Co. - May 7

 Obligatory disclaimer: real life sucks. Just ask the Peloton™ team: they have only just recovered from their previous ad snafu, one that smelled of either sexism or of the Dark Mirror™ TV series, and now they got another scandal: apparently, children are getting into accidents over their treadmill equipment, and are getting hurt, maybe even seriously.

Listen, I don’t like Peloton as much as the next lazy guy, but even I have to admit that an indoor gym equipment isn’t necessarily child friendly, and as such, children – especially young ones – should be kept away from it, or at least – kept under supervision. This time, Peloton isn’t exactly at fault here, you know?

…On the other hand, we live in a world where endangered condors are trashing people’s homes, so all bets are off, actually. Let us try to talk about a less bizarre topic, i.e. the bad batch, the titular characters.

…No, I have no intention to talk about the series’ premiere in detail, let us just point out that the group’s villain, Crosshairs is…

No, let us try again. The Bad Batch themselves are a variant clone of the AoS’ team Bus from the get-go, just as the core characters of the ‘Blindspot’ TV series had been. Omega, of course, is the new Skye, while Crosshairs is Grant Ward, save that he is actually mind-controlled by some chip here, and thus has an out, (sort of): he was really made to do it and his mind isn’t entirely his own. It’s a thin excuse, but Ward didn’t have even this; actually, he never had anything, he hadn’t been fully damned nor fully redeemed, but we’re not talking about him; we’re talking about Crosshairs, who is also modelled after a Marvel comics’ character, a minor villain named William Cross, who is a master sniper and planner, who has slightly cybernetic modifications, but who wasn’t in S.H.I.E.L.D., but rather in CIA, before he went bad. He is also bad at hand-to-hand combat, and everything, (except for S.H.I.E.L.D. and CIA, primarily), applies to Crosshairs: the clone might be a Grant Ward variant mentally, but physically, he is more of a variant William Cross instead. The cross-pollination between Disney’s various franchises is proceeding apiece quite nicely.

This brings us to DC, and its’ ‘Justice Society: WWII’ film. Listen. The DC franchise is in the middle of a latest reboot, which began with the ‘Superman: Man of Tomorrow’ animated movie. This specific person plays an important role in this film too, even though in the promo videos it was more about the Flash and Wonder Woman instead, but so what? DC is trying to reinvent itself…cosmetically, while remaining same old same old on the inside: JS: WWII is a variant of the first Gal Gadot Wonder Woman movie, though there’s a nice homage to ‘Flash’ the 2014-onwards TV series too. You are free to watch it, but it is forgettable. Anything else?

Ah yes, the first season of ‘Jupiter’s Legacy’ is available to watch now. I have tried to follow the original comic series, and found them to be confused – just what exactly did they want to be? They tried to be original, but they did no better than Hasbro’s ‘G.I. Joe’ franchise, which struggles to be something more than another S.H.I.E.L.D. vs Hydra variant in an increasingly Marvel vs. DC comic world, and in this world, Marvel is increasingly driven and motivated by Disney, (cough), while DC is trying to figure out what it wants other than bigger sales of its’ own merchandise. Nice.

…Into this fray entered the ‘Jupiter’ comics, which tried to leave a mark, tried to be original, but somehow have largely vanished without a trace, until now, when they’ve resurfaced with a complete reboot from the original plotline, and-?

And nothing. Not unlike the abovementioned DC film, people will either enjoy the ‘Jupiter’ series, or not. There is nothing memorable or outstanding that gives them an advantage over the rest of their respective crowds, and so it is time to move on and to talk about something else.

For now though, this is it. See you all soon!

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